PHOTO PROMPT © Fatima Fakier Deria
It was the cargo that made him yearn to leave: the scent of sherry seeping through the barrel staves; the woody aroma of tobacco, leaves greasy and fibrous beneath his palms; bananas green as limes, ripening to sweetness snug in their wooden crates.
Through the years he watched the cargo ships come and go, crusted with salt and barnacles, his own feet planted firmly on the dockside.
One day he was gone. Some say he drank too deep and slipped beneath the dun waters. Others liked to imagine a stowaway, a stranger scented with tobacco … and a whiff of sherry.
Written for Rochelle Wisoff-Fields’ Friday Fictioneers. See the pic and write a tale and see here to join in and to read the other, fantastic stories.
*The title is a misquote from Henry Wadsworth Longfellow’s Secret of the Sea.
I love the sensuous images in this.
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Thanks so much Neil 🙂
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What Neil said. And I think he decided to stow away to some Shangri-La, and I hope he found it 🙂
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Thank you so much – I hope that too
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This is a feast for the senses… I really hope for the second fate.
Hm, now I’m craving banana.
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Haha! Thanks Magaly. Glad you enjoyed it
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As well as the sensual richness I liked the alliterations — the hard ‘c’s suggesting permanence and substance, the sibillant ‘s’ sounds conjuring up the soughing of wind and slup of water in exotic places.
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Thank you so much, Chris. I do like a sprinkling of alliteration myself – seems to work well in these short stories at least. Thanks so much for the kind comment 🙂
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Dear Lynn,
Such wonderful descriptions that had me right there on the dock. I’m also hoping he realized his dream. Well done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks so much Rochelle. I’m glad the descriptions worked for you – I do have such fun playing with them! Thanks for reading and the kind comment
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Mmmmm Your writing is a feast for the senses! Kudos.
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Thank you so much, Alicia. Glad it worked for you 🙂
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Your descriptions are exquisite as always Lynn. Superb stuff.
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Thank you Iain. Very glad you liked it
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fabulous descriptive writing, I felt I could smell it and feel it.
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Thanks so much for the kind comment. Glad you liked it and thanks for reading 🙂
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I could smell what he smelled. I could feel what he felt. Nicely done!
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Thank you so much. I’m really glad it took you there 🙂
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You drew beautiful images with this story.
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Thanks so much Michael 🙂
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This definitely was a feast for my eyes, for my senses.. I absolutely loved this, Lynn! And I so hope he managed to slip onto one and start a fabulous journey of his own
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Full of smells and sensations. A lovely little story, tight as a drum 🙂
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Thanks Jane. FF is certainly good at training you to trim excess fat from your tales – no bad thing 🙂
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Your story is a perfect example of why it is no bad thing.
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🙂
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…I like to imagine the latter!
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Me too Martin 🙂
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Sensuous imegaery at its very best. Lynn, keep coming up with such lovely writings.
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Thanks so much Neel 🙂
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oops! i meant imagery
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Aah, this makes me want to jump aboard and sail away. Wonderful writing, Lynn.
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Thanks so much, Gabi. Glad you liked it 🙂
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Loved your descriptions and the romantic feel of this piece.
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Thank you so very much 🙂
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I loved the imagery, Lynn. Great use of the sense. I could smell the pipe tobacco and sherry.
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Thans so much Russell. Feel like stowing away myself 🙂
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One may never know where “the old man and sea” ended up on his “voyage to the center of the earth”. I can misquote in sentence form…it’s a gift… Hahahaaa! Feeling a bit punchy this morning. Great read!
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Thanks so much – hopefully his Paradise will not be Lost! (Bit of a strangled misquote there, but hey)
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I have no option but to repeat what others have already said, the writing’s great, sensuous and brilliantly descriptive
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Thank you so much, Michael, you’re very kind.
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Many years ago I worked a summer in a shipyard… I certainly met people with dreams; alas the likely end would be that they would be drunk and take a fall.
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I can imagine. Being in Bristol, with a harbour right in the middle of the city, and that harbour now regenerated into the hub of the town’s night life, we regularly have the same, sadly. Nights out that turn to tragedy
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I think he ran away to sea – all men are boys at heart, don’t they say?
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In my experience, that’s very tue, Liz! Thanks for reading 🙂
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So wonderfully descriptive, conjured up images in front of my eyes.
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Thank you so much, that’s very kind of you 🙂
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This is so romantic. I wish I could be a stowaway on him, you know, the fly in the pocket. Quick peek..
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Thanks so much. Yes, I’ve often wanted to sneak into people’s luggage when they’re off on their hols. Thanks for reading 🙂
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Yes, I prefer to imagine the latter.
Nice imagery Lynn.
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Me too Dawn! Thanks for reading 🙂
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The first paragraph carried me to a dockyard. Thanks a lot for that vivid picture!
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Thank you so much. Living in Bristol where we have the harbourside in the centre of the city, we’re forever reminded of its seafaring past. Of course now the warehouses are all cafes and museums and bars, but we still have the huge cranes that used to load the ships. Glad the story worked for you
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No wonder your description was brilliant! I do agree, time changes the view so drastically.
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Very true, though I’m glad the buildings were given new uses and not demolished. And the cranes often have acrobats suspended from them at festivals! 🙂
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Oh! That sounds lovely… I’m glad that they are indeed preserving the structures. Thanks a lot for sharing.
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It’ quite a sight 🙂
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