PHOTO PROMPT © Victor and Sarah Potter
Winter was hard.
The streets were slick and glassy, icicles sang from every tree – a high, unearthly tune – and even the harbour was clogged, jagged plates of ice knocking, sliding one over the other, only for their cold geometry to refreeze each night as the sun vanished.
We were standing by a brazier when we saw the strangest thing. Webs, the spokes and lines frilled white and at the centre of each, the crystal bauble of a spider, waiting for a last meal that never came.
‘A sad sight,’ said Barney, hands purpled and blotchy.
He’s a good man.
Written for Rochelle Wisoff-Field’s Friday Fictioneers, the best prompt on the ‘web’. See the photo and write a tale and don’t forget to share and read the other contributions here.
Liking so many of the carefully crafted descriptions in this one, especially ‘cold geometry.’ A human affection for all small things is a winning attribute. I knew someone who used to stroke the backs of bees!
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Wow! Not sure I’d be brave enough to stroke their backs, though I have tried to save honey bees from spiders before – to no avail. They are wonderful, wonderfully strange creatures. Thank you Pola
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Sympathy for the spider.
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And why not indeed 🙂
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Seems like a lot of things are going on here. Was it a nuclear winter? Is that why his hands were purple and blotchy? Intriguing piece, Lynn.
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Thank you. Ah, I see where you’re going here, but as someone who suffers from poor circulation, lives in a temperate climate and has what is often quite a cold job, I was just writing from experience – my hands are often purple (and red!) and blotchy from the cold at this time of year. Thank you for leaving such a thoughtful comment Varad
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I liked your description of the wintry landscape, particularly the singing icicles
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Thanks so much Neil 🙂
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Like Pola, I love ‘cold geometry’. So much excellent description in this piece, Lynn. A lovely read.
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Thank you so much Penny – very lovely of you
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Great icy descriptions! Love the singing icicles.
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Thanks so much Josh. Glad you liked it 🙂
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Loved the imagery in this story!
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
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Thanks Susan 🙂
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Your description of place is wonderful. The last line confused me. Is it because he’s sad for the frozen spider?
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Yes, that was my thinking, that the narrator admires the fact that Barney can feel compassion for the spiders even as he himself is freezing. Possibly could have described that more clearly, but I would have needed a handful more words. Thanks for reading Irene
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I see that there is something deeper in that sadness for a dead spider… I assume that there are many things dead or dying in this frozen world.
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You could be right there Bjorn – the spiders are just another victim of the long, seemingly endless winter. Thank you for reading
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No one thinks of the poor spiders in the cold winter – although I happily still remove them from my house and stick them back outside! Gorgeous descriptions Lynn.
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Thank you Iain. I remember few winters ago seeing a row of spiders webs on some railings, each with frozen dew drops sparkling all over them. I wonder where the spiders went? We kept catching spiders and putting them outside until we read that they’re probably house spiders, evolved to live with in homes and likely to die outside. Now we leave them be. Though I absolutely understand if you can’t stand them – they’re not everyone’s favourite 🙂
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Yeah, I still don’t feel guilty about putting them outside!
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Haha! You’ve got to do what you’ve got to do, Iain 🙂
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I love different takes!!!
Scott
Mine: https://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2018/01/10/welcome-to-my-parlor/
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Thanks Scott 🙂
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U r welcome!
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Great descriptions, as always, Lynn. That last line was a killer. Nothing like a man who shows sympathy to some poor little creature even when he himself is doomed.
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Glad you read it that way – I think a couple of people thought the ending was a bit obscure. I liked that thought though, seeing the spiders and having a fellow feeling because everyone is in the same predicament. Not sure if that’s how many behave when it comes down to it, sadly. Thank you Joy
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Not many behave that way, but a “good man” does. I thought it was lovely.
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Thank you so much Joy
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Fabulous! LIke all the rest, I loved your icy descriptions and even the matter-of-factness of the gentleman’s comment.
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Superbly written. I could totally imagine this
Click Here to see what Mrs. Dash Says
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What an absolutely superb description of the harsh and cruel winters. I felt chilled to the bones just reading it.
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cold geometry singing icicles
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This is a deep and mysterious one. Why was he a good man? Why did it matter? What kind of world is this? I love all the unanswered questions you raise.
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Beautiful descriptions, Lynn . Love your word art. Thanks for writing .
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Thanks so much, Moon. What a really lovely comment! Thank you for reading
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I visit your site for a descriptive feast. And I’m seldom disappointed. Lovely piece.
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Thank you so much for the lovely comment Sandra. And I’m very glad not to disappoint you! Best wishes, Lynn
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Dear Lynn,
As always you’re the mistress of imagery. Your ending lines make this a page turner leaving me wanting to know more about Barney. Good one.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you so much, Rochelle . What a lovely comment. I truly appreciate your feedback. Many thanks
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Even though it was not a sad story per se, there was so much inherent sadness. Superbly written!
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I like “a last meal that never came.” That’s heavy! Nice, tight imagery..the purple, blotchy hands too. Well done, Lynn. Let’s get back to work and do some more!
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Thank you so much Bill. Glad you felt the imagery worked – I do love that! Yep, back to it 🙂
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What a lovely picture you paint.
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Thank you so much Liz.
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I don’t know why, but the Rolling Stones Song, Sympathy for the Devil is playing in my head. A dead spider never causes me a tear.
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Ah, what a great song choice! Though I think it might be overstating it to ally spiders with the Devil 🙂 Thanks for reading Susie
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Excellent description, which felt like my world last week. I feel for the spiders.
The fact that your last line was written in present tense gave me pause as if something more were about to happen.
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Thanks so much Sascha and thatnks for the feedback re the last line. If the spiders have any sense they’ll hide away while t’s so cold 🙂
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You have given such vivid imagery I felt a shudder.
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Thanks so much Dawn
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I got freezing fingers just reading this! Excellent Lynn.
Click to read my FriFic!
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Thanks Keith 🙂
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Excellent descriptive piece, This is one of my favorites this week.
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Ah, thank you so much. So glad you liked it 🙂
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Great use of every word 🙂
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Thanks so much 🙂
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Lynn, I loved the poetic tone, except of the purpled and blotchy hands. In MN at negative 20 that line is a little too stinging.
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Thanks Dan and thanks so much for reading and your feedback 🙂
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Excellent piece, Lynn. You can tell a lot about a man’s character by the way he treats “the least of these.”
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Ah, so true, Russell. And that’s bad news for so many people, judging by the state of the world. Thank you so much for reading and for your – always – kind and considered comment
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Your vivid descriptions located me at the scene, Lynn. It takes active empathy to feel sorry for all forms of life. Good writing as usual. —- Suzanne
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